#14 :It's plain useless forgiving someone who does the same mistake again and again.

quarreled with Hilary earlier on, oh anyway we quarreled over smth lame. But the most important part is not what we quarreled about but is about the TRUST. I know ppl out there is going to be like " aiya lame la, quarrel over this" and etc but hey udk anything that is happening so pls don't make so much comments thank you.

Furthermore, i don't even know why i forgive her again and again despite her hurting me times after times. I don't understand, i really don't. It's just not me.

I have no idea who to trust right now and that feeling is just awful 

I have so much to say, really. I know my attitude is like shit. So why should i even expect ppl's attitude to me to be nice too? Fuck it, i don't even know what's wrong with me this few days. I'm getting really upset & angry easily. & i totally have no idea why is this even happening to me... is my period going to visit me real soon...? 

i flared up so easily, i cry easily. i smile easily, I get upset easily too. & i don't think it's something good though? 

I'm feeling so horrible, really just plain fucking horrible. i really want a getaway like real soon, i want to leave this place as long as possible. i don't want to face all this shit again and again. I'm really sick and tired of it. & what's worse is that i don't want ppl to know and I'm not going to reply nor tweet anything. 

i really just can't take it any longer. today wen suddenly asked me if i quarreled with bel I'm like... 😶 i dk what am i suppose to tell her, firstly it's not that i don't trust her or anything. it's just that it's between me and bel and i don't really want to say much about it as I was really feeling so down yet pissed at that period of time and yet idw to affect other ppl's mood at the same time and so I can only act normal in front of then... fucking hell, can die. 

" Nobody to talked to, nobody i can trust. I'm just all alone by myself. " 

on a brighter side it's pay day tmr. i really can't wait, am feeling so broke for this god damn month. oh dear i really wonder how i survived.... it's only 9:37pm and I can't wait to sleep dk why am i feeling so sleepy...